You
smell with your nose
You
see with your eyes
You
feel with your hands
You
taste with your tongue
You
think with your mind
You
feel with your emotions
Wow,
how the senses glisten!
Oh,
You hear with your ears too, BUT
You
must know how to listen
Pensacola Helene
Burt and Gurt had been a couple for
a few years now and they were pretty happy and content. Burt was really busy
and lately Gurt had not seen much of him. He was always saying, “Gurt, if you
need anything, just say it; just let me know.” Well she was really thirsty and
needed something to drink.
So the next time Burt came home she
said, “Burt I really need a glass of water.” Burt smiled and immediately went
out and bought Gurt a bouquet of flowers. Gurt was really pleased and thanked
him profusely. Burt went on his merry way.
Gurt was a little confused, but
after a while she asked him again, “Burt I really need a glass of water.” Burt
kissed her on the cheek and went out and bought a beautiful new dress and some
shoes. He was so pleased with himself. Gurt was appreciative, but wondered if
she was expressing herself the right way. Anyway a few weeks later Gurt
communicated to Burt again, with more clarity, that she needed a drink of
water.
Burt being the enthusiasts he was he
went out and bought her a brand new diamond ring. The fourth time she asked it
was a mink coat and the fifth time it was new furniture.
One day Burt came home and found
Gurt sunk down in one of their big chairs. “What’s wrong with you, Gurt?”
“Burt, I’ve asked you for a drink of
water several times, but you haven’t gotten it yet. I’m thirsty.” Burt blew his
cool.
“Oh my goodness, woman, you are
never satisfied. I bought you flowers, clothes, jewelry and everything else.
What more do you want?”
“A glass of water.” Gurt said
gently.
“You are always complaining! Nothing
I do is right or pleases you! You know how much I spent on trying to make you
happy! Do you know how hard I work?” While he was talking Gurt slithered out of
the chair onto the floor. When he noticed, he ran to her side. “Gurt! Gurt!!”
In a panic, he called Relationship 911. They asked him what happened. He told
them the whole story, then desperately asked, “….what should I do?”
They shouted through the phone, “GIVE
HER A GLASS OF WATER!!”
Burt finally got the message.
Listening is a skill and too often
people don’t pay attention to what is being said and misinterpret the message
being conveyed. You must understand the
message from the other person’s perspective.
That person that is frustrating you
and accusing you of not listening may be right. You may have the Burt syndrome
and a Gurt problem.
Simple solutions: 1) Repeat what you
heard and then check with the person to make sure you understood what you heard.
2) Don’t interrupt when they are talking and don’t spend the time thinking
about what you’re going to say. 3) If they are talking about something you’ve
done, don’t defend - keep listening no matter the topic – it’s about the person
talking not you.
Listening is a “love” skill and one
of the greatest gifts you can give to any relationship.
Pensacola Helene
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